Well, I told it would be a wild card! And I do suck. Thursday night, I let crazy get the better part of me. Those close to me probably wouldn't be surprised, but that doesn't really make it OK.
Part of the reason I started this blog was to work through the toughest year of my life (thus far). Certainly not trying to be a bummer here, but it's true. And some days/nights I'm stronger, better, more in control than others. Thursday night was an other.
I feel like I took three steps back after a very solid week of nothing but positive, getting-your-life-together, feeling-like you-can-do-this progress. It's just such a letdown. I know I can keep up the progress and that I need to just keep putting one foot in front of the other until hopefully something starts to make sense, it's just that days like Thursday wear on me.
I'm stronger than letting myself get overwhelmed with emotion. I am smarter than drinking so much on a work night. I know better than to dial certain numbers. The story is basically a dramatic version of these three things happening. We'll leave it at that.
Regardless, I am very lucky to have people in my life supporting me, doing what they can to keep my head up. I can't say I've felt this way before, and that in, and of itself, is progress.
Happier posts are on the horizon...
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